


Hate Me.

by AnnaKaylan



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Armitage Hux Needs A Hug, Gay, Implied Sexual Content, It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better, Love, M/M, Poe Dameron Is A Mess, Post-Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker, Rewrite
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-12
Updated: 2020-03-12
Packaged: 2021-02-28 19:14:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,956
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23112283
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnnaKaylan/pseuds/AnnaKaylan
Summary: This is angsty and the ending that Hux deserved. Get out of my face.
Relationships: Poe Dameron/Armitage Hux
Comments: 4
Kudos: 65





	Hate Me.

**Author's Note:**

> Based on the song Hate Me by Blue October.

𝑨𝒏𝒅 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒂 𝒔𝒂𝒅 𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒕, 𝑰 𝒔𝒂𝒚 𝒃𝒚𝒆 𝒕𝒐 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒘𝒂𝒗𝒆, 𝒌𝒊𝒄𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒔𝒉𝒂𝒅𝒐𝒘𝒔 𝒐𝒏 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒔𝒕𝒓𝒆𝒆𝒕 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒚 𝒎𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒌𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝑰 𝒉𝒂𝒅 𝒎𝒂𝒅𝒆.

A final stab in the heart, really. He'd be lying if he said he didn't love the Resistance pilot that had been captured months ago. No. He loved him deeply. But he wasn't stupid. Armitage knew that if his feelings were discovered, Poe would be found and executed. And that was much more likely now that Snoke's rabid dog was wandering around the Finalizer's halls. Ren had a fascination with sticking his nose where it doesn't belong. Namely, Hux's thoughts. If he were to discover the fact that Dameron was still on board and that Hux cared deeply for him, he would force the general to kill his lover to prove his loyalty to the Order, and most likely kill the general anyways, afterwards. Hux wondered how he'd fallen into this mess. Poe was feisty and rash and impulsive. Completely unlike the General of the First Order. They were two sides of the same coin. Complete opposites that never should have come face to face. But they did. Hux was there when Poe was taken off the ship into the hangar. Dameron looked around in amazement and Hux was... Enchanted, really. The Resistance fighter looked around as though he wasn't in First Order captivity. Dameron wasn't scared. He was in awe.

It'd had happened way too quickly for Hux's liking. Poe had told the redhead that he loved him one night when the other was nearing the edge of sleep. Poe didn't know if he hoped Armitage would hear him or if he wouldn't hear him. Hux shot up out of bed and dressed, leaving the confused pilot in the bed and throwing himself into his work. He stopped spending time with the pilot. Started giving him the cold shoulder, treating him like he no longer mattered. Dameron wondered if that was his plan. Make him fall in love with the general and then destroy his heart. His hope. Hope was his downfall here. He believed that Hux would love him. He hoped that they could find a way.

"What did you expect, Dameron?!" Hux shouted, anger rising quickly. "Did you expect me to throw my life's work away? Leave and have a target on my back for the rest of my life? Did you expect me to fall to my knees and declare my love and take your hand and run off?!"

"I don't know what I expected. But it wasn't this."

Looking back now, Hux could see all of the warning signs. He didn't know how he didn't see it before. Perhaps he just didn't want to. But by the time it became clear to him, it was too late. He was in too deep. So he did what he did best. And he pushed Dameron away with his feelings until Dameron was no longer his. Poe Dameron—his lover, his enemy, his everything. He'd pushed him and pushed him and pushed him until eventually, he was gone. Hux stood on the bridge, watching the stolen TIE fighter grow smaller. And a gloved hand raised to wave the pilot goodbye. His heart lunged and the moment he was tucked safely into his chambers, the blaster at his hip was unsheathed. Shots were fired until the blaster was dead. Paper was scattered across the floor, glass and wood splinters everywhere. Everything was destroyed. And in the midst of the mess was a sight no one had ever seen before. The general, usually calm and stoic, was sobbing on his knees, screaming and throwing and ripping whatever he could.

𝑨𝒏𝒅 𝒍𝒊𝒌𝒆 𝒂 𝒃𝒂𝒃𝒚 𝒃𝒐𝒚 𝑰 𝒏𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓 𝒘𝒂𝒔 𝒂 𝒎𝒂𝒏 𝒖𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒍 𝑰 𝒔𝒂𝒘 𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒃𝒓𝒐𝒘𝒏 𝒆𝒚𝒆𝒔 𝒄𝒓𝒚 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝑰 𝒉𝒆𝒍𝒅 𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒇𝒂𝒄𝒆 𝒊𝒏 𝒎𝒚 𝒉𝒂𝒏𝒅𝒔 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒏 𝑰 𝒇𝒆𝒍𝒍 𝒅𝒐𝒘𝒏 𝒚𝒆𝒍𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒈, "𝒎𝒂𝒌𝒆 𝒊𝒕 𝒈𝒐 𝒂𝒘𝒂𝒚."

The war was over. Hux survived. Barely. He was discovered to be the spy for the Resistance and he was shot in the abdomen by Allegiant General Pryde. But troopers loyal to him disobeyed orders from Pryde. The med droids did what they could and the soldiers put him in a shuttle and sent him to a far off moon in the Outer Rim Territories. The Gordian Reach. More specifically, the Yavin system. It was a planet known to be sympathetic to the Resistance but entirely neutral. Yavin 4. One of the three in inhabitable moons of the gas giant, Yavin. It was a beautiful planet, really. Full of green. Compared to other planets he'd seen where the people hadn't valued the nature of their home, this place seemed like a paradise. It was nothing like what he could remember of Arkanis. When the pod he was in landed and he collapsed, the people of the nearby village found him. Helped him. They took care of his wound. They nursed him back to health, even when they doubted he'd live. He'd been in a coma for four days. It amazed him how fast he had adapted to their lifestyle. He helped take care of Old Man Kes, who had all but died. The poor man had no recollection of his life. His family. He looked strikingly like Poe Dameron, and Hux wondered if perhaps Poe was from this planet. Traits common to the people were dark curls and brown eyes and golden skin and he remembered Poe more and more vividly every day. And every time he saw Old Man Kes he was struck with the image of the man he had fallen in love with, fighting back tears that threatened to pour down his face. He violently pushed those memories away, fighting the feelings like he always had, until he could no longer. He'd be fine. He just needed a bit. He'd move on and settle his life here and maybe, just maybe, he could be happy.

𝑱𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝒎𝒂𝒌𝒆 𝒂 𝒔𝒎𝒊𝒍𝒆 𝒄𝒐𝒎𝒆 𝒃𝒂𝒄𝒌 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒆 𝒋𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝒍𝒊𝒌𝒆 𝒊𝒕 𝒖𝒔𝒆𝒅 𝒕𝒐 𝒃𝒆.

Everything was normal that day. It was quiet, save the bustle of the children running and playing. The sun was shining and if you listened close enough, you could hear the wind blowing through the leaves and the animals in the forest. After he had cleaned up and done his laundry and helped the lady next door carry her basket of fresh picked apples inside, he had gone to see Old Man Kes to help him with his breakfast. Kes didn't answer the door. Didn't greet him. He walked into the house announcing his presence. Kes still didn't answer him. He walked to the man's bedroom and there he was. Hux cried for the second time in his remembered life. Kes cared about him. Always made sure he was okay. Always asked for stories about his former job. Even when the old man forgot who Armitage was, he always eventually remembered. Kes always made sure that he'd eaten and gotten enough sleep. Hux was devastated. When he'd arrived on the planet, he'd told no one his name. He said it's because he didn't remember. Maybe he wanted to start over. Maybe it was because he was scared that the villagers would recognize the name and would kill him. But he looked different. Where the people had dark hair, he had red hair. Where they had dark eyes, he had green. Where they had golden skin, kissed by the sun, he was pale. So the people called him Red. Kes was the only one to know his name.

"His poor son... When he comes home, he will find his father dead."

That struck Hux as odd. In all the time he'd spent with Kes, he'd never heard of the man's son. Of course, Kes wasn't all there anymore.

"I didn't know he had a son..." Armitage said softly.

"Mhm. A pilot for the Resistance. Poe Dameron. He was a sweet boy. Brave and-"

Hux froze. He should've put the dots together. Days later, the shuttle landed. And out stepped the all too familiar Resistance fighter. He saw it from his window. Hux stayed in his house as people rushed to meet the Resistance hero. The villagers told Poe about his father, and about the strange man who'd came months earlier and cared for his father. A woman told him where he could find the man.

"What's his name?"

"He never told us his name," the villager told Poe. "But he has red hair. So we call him Red. Old Man Kes knew his name. But he was the only one. Red adored that man."

"Red hair? Where did he come from?"

"Arkanis. He crash landed in a shuttle months ago with a blaster shot to the abdomen. Almost didn't make it. But he's a fighter. Your father was the first to approach him after he'd been healed."

Poe thanked the woman speaking to him and walked up to the house that he'd been told the man was in.  
A knock at the door and Armitage called out for a moment. His voice was rough, deeper. Poe recognized the voice but couldn't place it. When he did place, he knew he should have left. But his feet were frozen in place, and the door swung open.

𝑨𝒏𝒅 𝒉𝒆 𝒘𝒉𝒊𝒔𝒑𝒆𝒓𝒆𝒅, "𝒉𝒐𝒘 𝒄𝒐𝒖𝒍𝒅 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒅𝒐 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒕𝒐 𝒎𝒆?"

Face to face for the first time since Hux had ripped them apart. They stood in silence, both frozen, both pale and looking as though they'd seen a ghost. Villagers on the street watched them. The former General looked as though he hadn't been out of bed in days. Poe couldn't help but notice the change in his appearance. Sea foam green eyes were brighter due to the bloodshot white around them, ginger hair long and messy and out of place. His skin, once pasty and pale, was littered with freckles. A sun burn was apparent on his nose and cheeks. He was strikingly different. This man was not the same man who was once General of the First Order. Kes was the first person in a long time that he'd gotten close to, and it was obvious that his death ripped Hux apart. Dameron could see it in his eyes. Hux clearly loved the villagers, but Kes must've been one of the only ones to gain his personal affection. Poe thought about making a joke about how Dameron men must've had a gene for being able to charm Armitage Hux. He didn't. Hux's heart was ripped out once again in a few days just seeing the man he never stopped loving. He collapsed and found himself in the arms of the pilot he'd treated so terribly. He didn't know what happened. They sat and talked about everything and nothing. Poe said he wished that he was there for his father in his last days. Hux told him that it was better that he wasn't. His father was... Not entirely there. And it only would have hurt Poe more than necessary. He wasn't sure how long they talked, or what exactly they'd talked about. But when he woke up the next morning in the arms of the man he had fallen in love with, he knew that what had happened was supposed to.

Domestic life came much more naturally to him than he thought it might have before. Yavin 4 had quickly gained his affection, as did the people in his village. And they were all happy to have been able to "introduce Poe Dameron to his true love." Armitage and Poe never corrected them. They found out his name the day that it forever changed, and he was grateful that the only name they'd ever know him by was Armitage Dameron.


End file.
